Friday, January 16, 2009

Romance, Affection, and Lap Dances

With Valentine's Day just around the corner, I got to thinking about expressions of affection. The flowers, the candy, the going out to dinner…sure, they're great. But what has always impressed me was creativity. I want to feel special a few days of the year (hopefully, not just on major holidays!), and in general, I'm much more impressed with creativity and thoughtfulness than I am with something expensive.

All this thought about romance made me wonder what a man might really like for Valentine's Day. Do they really want flowers or candy or dinner out? Or do they, just like us, want moments of when their partner is creative and thoughtful? And it occurred to me that maybe some do. But what would be creative? What would be just…what…he…wants?

And then it hit me. A stripper.

Now, before you get up in arms about this, I'm talking about you. You, laced up in a pretty package, ripe for the unwrapping. What could possibly be better?

With this in mind, I started talking to a few male friends. I asked these guys if their girlfriends or wives had ever done a strip tease for them. The guys whose partners had done a strip tease for them loved it, which is not at all surprising. But during the course of these very interesting conversations, there were a few things that did surprise me. None of these women were stacked; instead, they were average or fuller figured. None of these women were 20; in fact, one lady I heard of was over 50. The hottest thing for these guys was that their partners made an effort to be sexy, to surprise them, and to make them happy. To me, that's what this romance stuff is all about!

So how exactly does one go about doing this? I wondered. I started doing a bit of research on stripping, reading web articles and books. The most important thing all of these resources said was that you needed to awaken your inner goddess…the one who flirts, who teases, who remembers—despite work and kids and laundry and dishes—that she is sexy. That she's desirable. That her body is powerful and beautiful.

Of course, I'm not saying that any of us need to hang upside down on a pole, with strobe lights and a smoke machine. But, if you set the mood just right, you can have a fun, sexy evening with very little preparation.

First, you'll need to set the mood. Maybe you are a romantic who would love soft candle light; maybe you are an exhibitionist who would revel in a brightly lit room. Choose music which appeals to you and pulses through your body. And get him comfortable in a chair with a great view of your show.

Dress to impress. Few of us have model's bodies, but all of us do have at least a few beautiful assets. Instead of trying to camouflage your faults, focus on drawing attention to the parts that you (and your partner) love. Accentuate all those bits he loves to look at.

The most important part of the strip tease is the tease. Don't just undress for him; make it tantalizing and provocative. Take your time…the slower, the better! He might just love the anticipation. And make him keep his hand to himself (although you should feel free to let your own hands roam over your body!).

Finally, remember that this is supposed to be fun. It's ok to look him in the eye, to smile, to laugh, to joke around. Don't worry about having the moves or the body of a professional. I am pretty sure that once the music begins and your clothes start coming off, you won't hear a single complaint.

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